you can wish in one hand and sh*t in the other and you know wich one will fill up faster but at least you have a clean hand with nothing in it to eat with

 

...

 

here's an idea. why don't you go outside and play hide and go f*** yourself.

 

I tried that game it is way too hard

 

One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures

My mom always said to me "Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else"

 

My wife told me the same thing. THen she mailed me a spiderman helmet.
I love beef stew!!!!!!!

 

WTF? !

there's a fine line between deer hunting and just standing in the woods like an idiot.

 

true story I have the helmet, it came with knee and elbow pads it is SWEET, I just wish it fit my head I look really silly with it on while I ride my bike to work.

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if you never win anything you can never lose it but if you lose something and you have to win it back your in trouble

 

If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done.

 

If you shoot for the stars thats a heck of a long way to fall, start small and invest in a trampoline