Sven was out shopping in the mall when he met his friend Ole outside the Jewelry Store. Ole noticed that Sven had a small gift-wrapped box in his hand.

Vhat have you just purchased Sven?" Ole asks.

Vell, now that you've asked," replies Sven, "It's my Lena's birthday
tomorrow And vhen I asked her this morning vhat she vanted for her birthday, Lena said, “Oh, I dun know, dear, yust give me something with vots of diamonds.

"So vhat did you get her?" Ole asks.
Sven smirks and says, "I bought her a deck of cards."

 

Lol!

 

Yew have yust received da Sven and Ole Computer Virus. Because ve don't know how to program computers, dis virus verks on da honor system. Please delete all d files on yewr hard drive manually and forward dis message to everyvon on yewr mailing list. Tank yew fer yewr cooperation. Sven and Ole.

 

 

One day Ole comes home from work and announces; "Leena! Pack your bags I've won the lottery!" Leena replies with excitement and says, "O Ole Where are we going?" Ole replies, "I don't think you heard me right, I said pack YOUR bags I'VE won the lottery."

 

 

Ole and Sven, the old retired Norwegian boys, lived at the Old Retired Norwegian Home.

One afternoon they were sitting on the front porch looking at the sunset and talking about this and that. Lena, who lived there too, was standing around the corner and heard the boys talking. Being a mischevious lady, Lena decided to play a trick on the boys.

Taking off all her clothes, she ran around the corner and raced past Ole and Sven as fast as she could run.

Ole and Sven watch in astonishment as Lena runs past. Finally, Ole asks, "Vasn't dat Lena?"

Sven replies, "Yah, ay - ay tank so..."

Ole says, "But, vat vas she vearing?"

Sven shakes his head and says, "Yah, ay don't know, but vatever it vas, it sure needed ironing!"

 

Ole was never very bright in school, but one day the teacher started speak'en his language. She asked the class,"Can anyone use the words defense, defeat and detail in one sentence?" Ole sprang to his feet with his arm stretched in the air. The teacher very suprised, told him to go ahead. Ole proudly stated,"Ven de horse jumps over de fence de tail comes after de feet."

 

Lol! That's cute.

 

Swen was standing on the street corner one day when Ole drove up in a new car. Swen asked, "Ole, where did you get the new car?" Ole answered, "I was out parking in the toolies with Lena, and she took off all her clothes and told me I could have whatever I wanted - so I took the car." Swen answered, "Well I think you made a wise choice, the clothes probably wouldn't have fit you anyway."