Well I guess i should have figure this one out a long time ago. My driveshaft was staying engaged in 2wd and i didnt think anything of it until i started trying to figure out why my 4wd light wouldnt come on when the transfer case was shifted to 4wd. After some research i learned that the CAD actuator controlled by vacuum was junk. I varified by checking for vacuum in 2wd = vacuum at the red hose and 4wd= vacuum at the black hose. The vacuum switch on the transfer case controls which hose gets vacuum. So basically the axles and driveshaft have been locked in 4wd for about 3 years. Instead of replacing the actuator I decided to eliminate that whole vacuum system with a 4x4 Posi-Lok #400 cable operated system. It should arrive in a week or so.
The big thing that should have alerted me to this problem was when my front driveshaft yoke froze up and busted my transfer case in half 3 years ago while i was towing a uhaul in 2wd.
The usual symptoms of a bad actuator is no 4wd at all so since i could get 4wd when i shifted the transfer case in 4wd I didnt think anything of it.

 

mine stuck once but i noticed right away when i made a turn.

 

mine wasnt going fully into 4wd. When trying to drive in 4wd the collar for the front axle would grind and pop in and out of 4wd. pulled it apart and the fork pads were missing and the actuator shaft was bent and rusty. put the posi lock cable kit in and now it works mint.