Subject: When dreams come true

A retired corporate executive, now a widower, decided to take a
vacation. He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded
to have the time of his life, until the ship sank.

He found himself on an island with no other people, no
supplies, nothing, only bananas and coconuts.

After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when
the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to the shore.

In disbelief, he asks, "Where did you come from? How did you
get here?"

She replies, "I rowed from the other side of the island. I
landed here when my
cruise ship sank."

"Amazing," he notes. "You were really lucky to have a row boat
wash up with you."

"Oh, this thing?" explains the woman. "I made the boat out of
raw material I found on the island. The oars were whittled from gum tree branches. I wove the bottom from palm branches, and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree."

"But, where did you get the tools?"

"Oh, that was no problem," replied the woman. "On the south
side of the island, a very unusual stratum of alluvial rock is exposed. I found if I fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into ductile iron..I used that for tools and used the tools to make the hardware."

The guy is stunned.

"Let's row over to my place," she says.

After a few minutes of rowing, she docks the boat at a small
wharf. As the man looks to shore,
he nearly falls off the boat. Before him is a stone walk
leading to an exquisite bungalow
painted in blue and white.

While the woman ties up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp
rope, the man can
only stare ahead, dumb struck. As they walk into the house, she
says casually,
"It's not much, but I call it home. Sit down, please".

Would you like a drink?"

"No! No thank you," he blurts out, still dazed. "I can't take
another drop of coconut juice.
"It's not coconut juice," winks the woman. "I have a still.
How would you like a Pina Colada?"

Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepts,
and they sit down on her couch to talk.

After they have exchanged their stories, the woman announces,
"I'm going to slip
into something more comfortable. Would you like to take a
shower and shave?
There is a razor upstairs in the bathroom cabinet."

No longer questioning anything, the man goes into the bathroom.
There, in the cabinet,
is a razor made from a piece of tortoise bone. Two shells honed
to a hollow ground edge
are fastened on to its end inside a swivel mechanism. "This
woman is amazing," he muses.
"What next?"

When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but vines,
strategically positioned,
and smelling faintly of gardenias. She beckons for him to sit
down next to her.

"Tell me," she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him,
"We've been out here for
many months. You've been lonely. There's something I'm sure you
really feel like doing right now, something you've been longing for?" She stares into his eyes. He can't believe what he's hearing. "You mean", he swallows excitedly and tears
start to form in his eyes.


"Don't tell me you've built a Golf Course."

 

good one, maj.