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Old Feb 26, 2010 | 10:31 PM
  #1  
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E-Mail of the Year!!


WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S. PRESIDENT, DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN, GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?




'My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of the Iraq regime has been completed.

Since Congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete.

This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq . This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the reckoning.


Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short . The United Kingdom , Spain , Bulgaria , Australia , and Poland are some of the countries listed there.

The other list contains every one not on the first list. Most of the world's nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening.

Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war. THEN EVERY YEAR THEREAFTER It'll GO TO OUR SOCIAL SECURITY SYSTEM SO IT WONT GO BROKE IN 20 YEARS.

The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world Hell holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.

Need help with a famine ? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France .

In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home. On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth.

Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France or maybe China .

I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France , and Russia . Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well.

I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York.

A special note to our neighbors: Canada is on List 2. Since we are likely to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not pissing us off for a change.

Mexico is also on List 2. Its president and his entire corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple thousand extra tanks and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put 'em? Yep, border security.

Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty - starting now.

We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we'll be drilling for oil in Alaska -which will take care of this country's oil needs for decades to come. If you're an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer you to List 2 above: pick a country and move there.

It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, 'darn tootin.'

Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is time to eliminate hunger in America . It is time to eliminate homelessness in America . To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thank you guys. We owe you and we won't forget.

To the nations on List 2, a final thought : You might want to learn to speak Arabic.

God bless America .. Thank you and good night.'

If you can read this in English, thank a soldier.
 
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Old Feb 26, 2010 | 10:52 PM
  #2  
yj junker's Avatar
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From: Turtle Creek N.B. Ca
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A special note to our neighbors: Canada is on List 2. Since we are likely to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not pissing us off for a change.

Read more: https://www.dieselbombers.com/bomb-s...#ixzz0gi0GTWiy
this just shows the intelligence of the people writing this stuff,they have no clueand the gullible eat ithow many Canadian are over there fighting this war?LOTS
 
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Old Feb 26, 2010 | 11:18 PM
  #3  
akguppy's Avatar
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Originally Posted by yj junker
A special note to our neighbors:
Read more: https://www.dieselbombers.com/bomb-s...#ixzz0gi0GTWiy
this just shows the intelligence of the people writing this stuff,...LOTS
Why did you link "Read more" to this same thread? That's not more, just the same words. Who is questioning whom's "intelligence?"
 
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Old Feb 27, 2010 | 12:00 AM
  #4  
handymanherb's Avatar
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From: Orlando Fl
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Originally Posted by akguppy
Why did you link "Read more" to this same thread? That's not more, just the same words. Who is questioning whom's "intelligence?"
That happens automatically when you copy and paste any part of a post

And it's just someone trying to be funny even though I'll like the to the UN trashed, we all know none of this stuff could ever happen so just read it and laugh or not.

It hit me funny, but then I just got in from having a good Margaretta, with dinner.
 
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Old Feb 27, 2010 | 04:00 AM
  #5  
97cummins's Avatar
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From: puyallup,washington
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Old Feb 27, 2010 | 06:54 AM
  #6  
tpcdrafting's Avatar
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From: WY
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Move Canada to list 1 where it belongs
Keep the UN booting in
Give their cars to the families of lost soldiers rather than scrap'em.
Keep the cutting of foreign aid in
Forget about isolationism, remember WWII?

Now, you're starting to build a list
 
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Old Feb 27, 2010 | 09:10 AM
  #7  
JKM's Avatar
JKM
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From: Sussex NB
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Originally Posted by handymanherb
A special note to our neighbors: Canada is on List 2. Since we are likely to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not pissing us off for a change.
Are you sure you want to **** US off?

CBC News Indepth: Water
America's Water Shortage Crisis: Water Wars | Your America | Reader's Digest
Las Vegas Running Out of Water Means Dimming Los Angeles Lights - Bloomberg.com


Seems like you fellers might be in for a fun ride in a few years. IIRC cali just cut off all water rights to farmers? I can only assume thats because they might see an oncoming water shortage
 
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Old Feb 27, 2010 | 09:29 AM
  #8  
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We been hoping Calf would drop in the ocean for 20 years now anyway
 
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Old Feb 27, 2010 | 11:03 AM
  #9  
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From: Pennsylvania
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**** LAs A/c off, and we wont need that much water run through the dams,
 
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