Funny Drunks...
#1
Funny Drunks...
A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she had selected the
following items: A half-gallon of 2% milk, A half carton of eggs, A
quart of orange juice, A small head of romaine lettuce, A 2-pound can of
coffee, And a 1-pound package of bacon. As she was unloading her items
on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched
as she placed the items in front of the cashier.
While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly
stated, "You must be single."
The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was
intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single. She
looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual
about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital
status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said "Well, you know
what, you're absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?"
The drunk replied, "'Cause you're ugly."
__________________________________________________ ___________
Kinda reminds me of Winston Churchill's famous comment one night he was argueing with a female MP. She said, "Mr. Churchill, you sir, are DRUNK!"
To which Churchill replied, "And you Ma'am, are ugly... But I shall be sober in the morning!"
following items: A half-gallon of 2% milk, A half carton of eggs, A
quart of orange juice, A small head of romaine lettuce, A 2-pound can of
coffee, And a 1-pound package of bacon. As she was unloading her items
on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched
as she placed the items in front of the cashier.
While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly
stated, "You must be single."
The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was
intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single. She
looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual
about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital
status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said "Well, you know
what, you're absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?"
The drunk replied, "'Cause you're ugly."
__________________________________________________ ___________
Kinda reminds me of Winston Churchill's famous comment one night he was argueing with a female MP. She said, "Mr. Churchill, you sir, are DRUNK!"
To which Churchill replied, "And you Ma'am, are ugly... But I shall be sober in the morning!"
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