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-   -   Mikey.... I found you a first car..... (https://www.dieselbombers.com/bomb-shelter/48670-mikey-i-found-you-first-car.html)

Benjamin 04-13-2010 06:14 PM

Mikey.... I found you a first car.....
 
2002 Focus – good reliable first car

2002 Focus – good reliable first car - $2000 (Cape Girardeau)

Date: 2010-04-01, 10:33PM CDT
Reply to: sale-fm8x7-1672654758@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]



Looking for a first car for a teen? This car is absolutely brilliant. It’s got low mileage (68k), has been super reliable, and is excellent on gas. Since you’re likely paying for the gas, this will make things much cheaper on you. I average like 37MPG to a tank. And with such low mileage, it’ll work great for a long long time.

But you wanna know the best reason to buy this car for your kid?

It’s slow as ####. You don’t have to worry about speeding tickets or accidents in this baby. Your kid could have a 1 mile run and hit a brick wall not wearing a seatbelt and not be going fast enough to do ####. And there won’t be any sense in him getting some ####ty ass fart can off of eBay – this car has the super slow SPI engine, no sense in trying to make it any faster. It’s a 4-door, so your kid won’t try to put gay ass Lambo doors on it. It is still possible to fit this with a body kit, but if you’d like, for an extra $200, I can stab him in the face if he does this.

It’s a 5-speed, so your kid can’t talk on his cell phone while playing Gameboy and smoking pot – he’ll have to actually pay attention. It also means you won’t have to pay for an automatic transmission when your kid beats the hell out of it. It’s got a new clutch and new tires, so you’ll know if he does burnouts. After all, I’m sure YOU’RE the one paying for tires, right? It’s got an aftermarket head unit in it, so your kid won’t #### it up when him and his buddies try to wire in a “phat ass system”. It’s already had the speakers replaced too, so he won’t have to tear the door cards on and then look like a retard when he can’t get them back on. It’s got manual windows too, so he can’t #### up the window motors when he rolls one of his friends heads up in it as a joke. A new battery means when he leaves his headlights on, it won’t leave you totally stranded.

But really though, one of the best parts is that, because it is a 4 door, it will be somewhat embarrassing for him to be seen in. I’m sure you get pissed at him from time to time. Hell, you’re probably mad at him for harassing you into buying him a first car. So get this one. It has no A/C, so you’ll know he’s suffering every time you get mad at him. Pretty satisfying. It’ll bring a smile to your face too, to know he’s rolling around looking like a faggot in a Ford Focus.

So buy this car for your kid. You won’t regret it


Contact: 573-334-4363
  • Location: Cape Girardeau
  • it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
http://images.craigslist.org/3nb3me3...4590341d46.jpg
PostingID: 1672654758

Red_Rattler 04-13-2010 06:33 PM

Ha! :D Its funny because it's true!

riddick01 04-13-2010 07:32 PM

to funny...

crzycummins 04-13-2010 09:07 PM

your kid when they find out you bought them a car...:jump:
your kid after they see their first car...:argh:
priceless

MikeyR 04-14-2010 07:54 AM

ya know that focus doesnt look bad BUT IT IS A FOCUS! besides it will probably be a while before i get a car my dad has already been informing me that i will be paying for it:s:

Blue01F250 04-14-2010 08:53 AM

lmao - this coming from a kid with bikini clad woman as his avatar... umm yah - pretty sure the Focus will "cramp his style" hehehe

that ad is hilarious!

Begle1 04-14-2010 09:11 AM

That's a great deal for $2,000. I'm almost interested in it as a commuter.

(Although for some reason everybody in school referred to the "Ford Focus" as the "Ford Fucus"... :w2:)

MikeyR 04-14-2010 09:16 AM


Originally Posted by Blue01F250 (Post 537499)
lmao - this coming from a kid with bikini clad woman as his avatar... umm yah - pretty sure the Focus will "cramp his style" hehehe

that ad is hilarious!

What you don't like my avatar

:w::drama:

Pyro690 04-14-2010 11:28 AM

:humm:

Blue01F250 04-14-2010 03:13 PM


Originally Posted by MikeyR (Post 537515)
What you don't like my avatar

:w::drama:

Nope, love the avatar - but that car definitely wouldnt' be cool enough for ya :tu:


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