Diesel Bombers - A letter you wouldn't want to be true

Dear Mom & Dad,
Our scoutmaster told us to write to our parents in case you
saw the flood on TV and are worried. We are okay. Only one of our
tents and 2 sleeping bags got washed away. Luckily, none of us got
drowned because we were all up on the mountain looking for Adam when
it happened.

Oh yes, please call Adam's mother and tell her he is okay.
He can't write because of the cast. I got to ride in one of the
search and rescue jeeps. It was neat. We never would have found
Adam in the dark if it hadn't been for the lightning.

Scoutmaster Ted got mad at Adam for going on a hike alone
without telling anyone. Adam said he did tell him, but it was
during the fire so he probably didn't hear him. Did you know that
if you put gas on a fire, the gas will blow up?
The wet wood didn't burn, but one of the tents did and also
some of our clothes. Matthew is going to look weird until his hair
grows back.

We will be home on Saturday if Scoutmaster Ted gets the bus
fixed. It wasn't his fault about the wreck. The brakes worked okay
when we left. Scoutmaster Ted said that with a bus that old, you
have to expect something to break down; that's probably why he can't
get insurance.

We think it's a neat bus. He doesn't care if we get it
dirty, and if it's hot, sometimes he lets us ride on the fenders.
It gets pretty hot with 45 people in a bus made for 24. He let us
take turns riding in the trailer until the highway patrol man
stopped and talked to us.

Scoutmaster Ted is a neat guy. Don't worry, he is a good
driver. In fact, he is teaching Jessie how to drive on the mountain
roads where there aren't any cops. All we ever see up there are
logging trucks.

This morning all of the guys were diving off the rocks and
swimming out to the rapids. Scoutmaster Ted wouldn't let me because
I can't swim, and Adam was afraid he would sink because of his cast
(it's concrete because we didn't have any plaster), so he let us
take the canoe out. It was great. You can still see some of the
trees under the water from the flood.

Scoutmaster Ted isn't crabby like some scoutmasters. He
didn't even get mad about the life jackets. He has to spend a lot
of time working on the bus so we are trying not to cause him any
trouble.

Guess what? We have all passed our first aid merit badges.
When Andrew dove into the lake and cut his arm, we got to see how a
tourniquet works.

Steven and I threw up, but Scoutmaster Ted said it probably
was just food poisoning from the left-over chicken. He said they
got sick that way with food they ate in prison. I'm so glad he got
out and became our scoutmaster. He said he sure figured out how to
get things done better while he was doing his time. By the way,
what is a pedal-file?

I have to go now. We are going to town to mail our letters
& buy some more beer and ammo. Don't worry about anything. We are
fine and tonight it's my turn to sleep in the Scoutmaster's tent.
Love, Jimmie