My truck is losing it; when I try to turn my brights on or off my washer fluid squirts out like I pushed the lever in but I'm just pulling back. Any clue?

 

Have you recently had things taken apart...maybe a couple wires pinched that are shorted to each other...outside of that I would suspect the switch itself. You should be able to unplug that and check it with a meter.

 

I sometimes have the same problem, mine usually does that when I'm drunk.

 

dont know if I could control the wipers and lights when im drunk. so I just risk the truck and hand the keys over

 

the high / low washer is all part of the same switch

http://www.dodge.com/bodybuilder/200...8w53wipers.pdf
wonder if your ground isn't bad or your switch is going out

 

it has quit doing it at the moment. I haven't messed with any wires or nothing.

 

replave the multi-function switch. It's a simple swap. Take the cover off the column, remove to screws, two wire connections, and swap it out. Very simple. Part from dodge cost about 70 bucks, just replaced mine a month ago. Had the same symptoms, changed it, no problems since. One tip, a small pair of channel lock pliers and a short phillips tip for a drill is a must...
hope it helps...